Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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