Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
