I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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