No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
