i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
