gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
