i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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