Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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