If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Randomize
