these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Screwed.edu
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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