I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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