He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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