I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
