Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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