My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
