Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
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