I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
