he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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