All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
