i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
