I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize