so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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