How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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