You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he was CRYING into my vagina
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize