Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
