He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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