he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
