I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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