Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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