Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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