i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
