You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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