just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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