his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Randomize