Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
