I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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