turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize