Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I just found puke in my bra..
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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