...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
