is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
