I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
