We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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