There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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