Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize