I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
