yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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