my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
There's always time for handjobs
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
