So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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