My hair reeks of homosexuality.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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