I got her a Nickelback box set.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Randomize
