i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
