I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
